Well, if I was asked that question I would have to say my wife…Annie. I’ve known her for going on six years now but seeing her pregnant has shown me things about her that I would not have otherwise seen. It has been amazing to see just how in love she has been with this little dude that we have yet to meet and the process of being pregnant and “building” him. She has been in tune and “present” every step of this journey, from our first pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage to this pregnancy that is now at 32.5 weeks.
I would not specifically point to one thing or use one adjective to describe my point, it has more to do with all the nuances and subtleties of her being her while carrying this human life. There are many men that have gone through this before me, but I wonder how in tune they have been. Since we, the men, aren’t the “carrying case” for these babies it can be hard I suppose, to be in touch with all that is going on. My response to men that have this issue is to be in tune with the woman; this can help if you are struggling to be in tune with the baby due to feeling a lack of connection.
My personal situation has been an absolute dream, I suppose I have been extremely lucky. Annie is not a complainer nor is she the type to sit around and do nothing. During this entire process she has been ready and willing to live our normal life the best that she can…she has been a trooper! She still works out at CrossFit two to four days per week and has been going to work like normal. And again, the words I’m using just don’t quite get my point across.
I guess what I’m talking about is the natural way in which Annie (and I’m sure so many pregnant women) has taken to being pregnant and embracing it with every smile and loving rub of her belly. She loves this baby boy more than anything…and for me to be able to have a front row seat to that makes me absolutely thrilled. Watching her be her, watching her interaction with this unborn bund connects me to the situation more than I can say. For a while I was trying to connect to the baby but it’s simply difficult for the guy, but what I was ignoring was Annie. By being in tune with Annie I am automatically connected to the baby because she’s my window to him.
It’s quite possible that I am not wording this as well as I would like to but the point here is that Annie has become my connection to the pregnancy and for some reason I was overlooking that and trying to be directly connected to the baby. This is Annie’s time…she is doing something that I will never be able to do and that’s okay. Allowing her this time is only making the three of us stronger. I probably don’t tell her as much as I should but it has been an absolute privilege to be front row. My hope is that other men have this opportunity in life, it’s proof that love is endless and it reminds us just how short this journey is. Slow down, absorb this time and all these crazy moments…they’ll be gone before you know it.