This Is Why I’m Tired!

Yes, they told us…they told us that we’d better get all the sleep we could before the baby arrived because we’d never sleep again! We laughed at them. Why? Well, for one, because we all know that you can’t store up sleep in a bank and cash it in after a sleepless night of getting up and down with the baby 7 times! We also laughed because we thought we’d figure it out…we’ll get our kid to sleep through the night, we’re smart, we can do this!

Well, turns out “they” were right, but not for the reasons you might be thinking; our little 4 1/2 month old Sammy DOES sleep through the night! He regularly goes for 9-10 hours at night…I put him down at 8:30 after a bath and bottle and he crashes out hard, not to be heard from until 6 or 7 the next morning. Wonderful you say??? YES! We love it, and are NOT complaining by any means. Especially after hearing stories of babies younger and older that still get up in the night to eat, cry, play, or just hang out. Our kid doesn’t do that, he’s somehow figured out that nighttime is for sleeping and for that alone I will consider him awesome!

But…(there’s always a “but”, isn’t there?) I’m still tired! It’s taken me a while, but I’m finally figuring out why! Ready for this one? It’s because of the mere fact that while I should be sleeping I’m thinking about how there’s a baby in our house! There’s a little living, breathing, sleeping dude just down the hall that looks to us for his entire survival. He’s part of both of us, and we’re shaping his future with each decision and action that we make. Plus, he’s super cute and funny and all that.

Like that’s not enough to have on my mind…he’s right there on the video monitor! His beautiful little sleeping face lights up our room like a beacon in the night! I roll over in the night and BAM! There he is. In my drowsy half-sleep I can’t help but stare for a while, wouldn’t you? Not sure if you knew this, but a sleeping baby casts a magical spell over anybody that makes eyelid contact with it. Why is that? Sleeping adults definitely aren’t very cute. So that’s one issue…which I sort of solved by turning the video off at night and leaving the sound on. That way if he freaks out in the night I’ll hear him, but I won’t be caught up in his mystical web of sleeping-baby-magic.

No video has helped, but of course there’s more! I have a job. Oh yeah, there’s that! And I like to exercise regularly…and there’s dinner to cook, and bottles to prepare, dishes to wash, diapers to change, laundry to do, bills to pay, trips to the market, date nights, family functions, social events, yard work, and plenty of wine to drink! Phewww…that made me tired just typing it! You’re probably nodding your head, thinking that I’m a little slow on the uptake. Of course there’s all that to do! But when I think back over my day, I count the time I spend with Sammy as the most important time. Seeing him smile, knowing that we’re doing this parenting thing, and it’s working so far is the most amazing, beautiful, overwhelming, and exhausting thing that I’ve ever experienced! All that other stuff is just details…details that don’t mean much in the big picture.

So, I’m tired. And I’m okay with that. I’m alive, and I have a beautiful life, rich with quality people, quality time, and quality experiences. I am lucky to be so tired!

For your pondering pleasure, here are a few of my favorite quotes about sleep:

“I can sleep when I’m dead”

“Get up, people die in bed!”

“Life is something that happens when you can’t get to sleep”