And by â??youâ? I mean almost all of us. We put everything under a microscope it seems and beat the hell out of it until we can have it make sense in our own minds. If we canâ??t properly label it and store it in our mental filing cabinet we freak out and at some point we give up on making sense of it and simply label it â??crazyâ?, â??lacking common senseâ?, â??stupidâ?, or â??ridiculousâ?.
But hereâ??s the thing, things donâ??t have to have labels and not everything needs to make sense.
I do this crap all the time. If I see weird behavior from our neighbors I sit there in my cozy little house and try to rationalize it and if I canâ??t I label them as crazy or stupid. Any time I canâ??t make sense of something it goes right to being negative. Thatâ??s why so much is screwed up in this world. Youâ??re trying to make sense of things based on YOUR definition of weird or normal and Iâ??m trying to do the same thingâ?¦so right off the bat weâ??re playing on different fields.
My point to this is that I am so tired of all the over analysis onâ?¦wellâ?¦everything. Why canâ??t something just be what it is? I understand the human psychological need to label things and file it away but how much is it actually helping when we do this, especially when it comes to those things we seemingly waste so much stinking time over analyzing?
Letâ??s take the topic of parenting since this blog is about Annie and I being parents. I see articles weekly that talk about working moms and the plight they have, stay at home dads, work at home dads, work at home moms, why Marissa Mayer (CEO of Yahoo) is a an idiot that doesnâ??t know what sheâ??s doing, how dads donâ??t understand what moms go through, if you spank your kids you will go to hell, why formula feeding is damaging your child, why you should or should not use a pacifier, and the list goes on and on and on and on.
We bash women that choose to be moms and not work. We bash women that choose to work and not have kids, ever. We bash women that choose to work and gambling online blackjack be moms. I mean, sweet Lord folksâ?¦just let things be as they are. There is no proof that one way is the right way. To me, it comes down to the individual and what their capabilities are. At the end of the day we are all human and we are all going to screw something upâ?¦that is bestowed upon us at birth. If you were born, which Iâ??m guessing you were if youâ??re reading this, we are guaranteed to screw up and we are guaranteed to die.
I guess this is all about â??why canâ??t we all just get alongâ?. I think the over analysis of what everyone else is doing in most cases is getting us nowhere. If anything I think itâ??s a waste of time and itâ??s diminishing the choices those people are making and who are we to make other people inferior? When did we become the end all be all? Right, we didnâ??t, weâ??re just as screwed up as the folks we tend to rip apart.
So let Marissa Mayer fail or succeed, whatâ??s it to you? Let your neighbor live their life and stop staring at them through the kitchen window while ripping them apart. All this time we spend telling other people how they should be living (kind of like what Iâ??m doing in this post) or critiquing them behind their backs does what? It takes time away from simply living our life.
Iâ??m all about having conversations (which entails talking, listening, and understanding) but I think there needs to be a line. A line where we agree to disagree or even a line where we simply say to someone, â??hey, you know what, thatâ??s not how I would do it but it really seems to be working for youâ?. Maybe it even goes back to the Bambi movie (I think that was the movie) where some character in there said something like, if you donâ??t have anything nice to say donâ??t say anything at all.
I donâ??t know, what are your thoughts? Am I off base here? Is over analysis good? Is it good when two writers go back and forth criticizing each otherâ??s parenting articles? Is it good to sit up on our hill looking down on everyone else because they donâ??t do things our way?